Here's this one's site:
The website name is "Circle of the Dragon." What is this a cult? I picture the website designer as a middle-aged guy with a black hooded cloak in a room full of creepy candles and skulls. Way to make a good first impression, man.
1. The first brilliant statement I found: "Note that not all dragons have wings, and can still fly." How does this at all make sense? YOU ARE AN IDIOT. Let me just put it out there: dragons are able to fly because they not only have large wings, but they also have four internal gaseous pockets (two near the lungs and two near the diaphragm) that inflates with a hot nitrogenous-helium compound that makes ascent in the air easier. If you're an idiot, just think of a hot air balloon. The mere thought of a snake just flying through mid-air is almost as ridiculous as Rob Pattinson finding work outside of the Twilight series. Good luck with that pal.
2. As I investigated the whole "flying snake" thing, the only evidence I could muster was this brilliant rendition of a "dragon" drawn probably in c
rayon. I was slightly impressed, until I realized that their drawing was just a ripoff of Pokemon. Watch out for its hyper beam attack, it'll set you back at least 60HP.
rayon. I was slightly impressed, until I realized that their drawing was just a ripoff of Pokemon. Watch out for its hyper beam attack, it'll set you back at least 60HP.3. Oh, get this one. RAINBOW DRAGONS. Yeah, rainbow. So I guess this is supposed to insinuate that dragons are not only on the same playing field as Pokemon, but that they are, also, gay.
4. And then there's this.
Is this supposed to be funny? A dragon at a computer, der dee der. You effing fool. I can tell just by this picture that your entire life is a joke. You have no IDEA how to take dragons seriously and need to just stop.
5. This website is supposedly all about dragons yet they have information on sea serpents. Sea serpents. For the last effing time, sea serpents are NOT dragons. The debate continues, but new evidence based on bone structure, nursing of young and regulation of internal body temperature has led many to classify sea serpents in the amphibia class, unlike dragons, which are members of class reptilia.
Another day, another point proven, and another sucky website that I wasted my time looking at. 
Dragons are, or rather were idiots! Explain to me how something that can breathe fire, fly, and scares the living crap out of people somehow finds a masterful way of extinctifying themselves is not an idiot. Dragons were idiots! All of them! Write about that Patrick, how dragons were idiots.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for this post Patrick! I really appreciated how you explained the science of dragon flight and dispelled the all too common belief that sea serpents are dragons. Edifying and insightful, as per usual.
ReplyDeleteHey Jason, let me put it to you this way: if dragons ARE (not WERE, because they still exist) such idiots, then how are they succeeding in continuing to make such bank at the box office?? Movies like "How to Train Your Dragon," "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire," "Dragonheart," Reign of Fire," "Twilight," "Dungeons and Dragons," "Gladiator," "Kim Possible: The Movie," "K-Pax," "Avatar," "Around the World in 80 Days," "Training Day," "Avatar 2," and "Y tu Mama Tambien" (it's in Spanish) are all testimonies to the brilliance of dragons. Though these movies tend to embellish the truth and "Hollywood-ize" dragons, they prove their monetarily oriented prowess alone, to say nothing of the actual instinctive cunning that are dragons as we know them.
ReplyDeleteJason's cousin Chas says:
ReplyDeleteHi Patrick,
I recently read the book "The Dragons are Singing Tonight", and was so appalled, I almost threw up on my Rob Pattinson poster. First of all dragons don't sing, secondly, the author makes dragons out to be a figment of people's imagination. Which we who are not idiots know is just false. Dragons are real. Deal with it. Does your Altoona Club have an account for supporting homeless, royalty-neglected, talent-bereaved dragons? The reason I ask is because I'm pissed about idiots who use dragon folklore and their incredible majesty for profit(Trogdor,DoubleDragon,Dragonball Z,Dragontales, and Puff) . What do the dragons get out of it? It is wrong is it not? It is. Wrong. And idiotic. Now I must clean the barf off of my Pattinson poster.
P.S.(Dragons flying without wings....hilarious and idiotic.)
chasforeman.wordpress.com
Once again there are NO DRAGONS in TWILIGHT. I'm going to start a whole blog about the subject. Also on a side note the Saturday morning children's cartoon "Jane and the Dragon" is the best current show about dragons and all things Anglo Saxon
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