Dragons Part 11

Okay, okay, I know I haven't exactly been up to speed on all this blogging B.S. like everyone else and their mother lately. But I have thus decided to forge through all the dumb emails that I get sent on a regular basis and keep writing! Lately, it's been (dumb) Rob Pattinson fans (losers) that have found the most offense in my writing. Therefore, allow me to preface this blog post by apologizing in advance to all mankind.

Now that all that gay, emotional crap is taken care of, it's time to rip into another crackle wagon's website:

The Reptilian Agenda

"The Reptilian Agenda." Yep, it's actually called that. Let's be honest, the only agenda this website is conveying is how humiliatingly stupid human beings can be.

Several historical issues came to my attention almost immediately. In documenting the History of Dragons, the author includes Hydras, Worms and Serpents. Though some serpentologists would argue for a pro-hydran evolutionary niche, it probably never existed. Certainly, the belief that their heads could multiply once severed-off is a result of an oral traditionary mythicism. (And for the record, the evidence of a multi-Homeric tradition carries far more weight than the solo-authorship view, nearly making the hydran theory almost conclusively unsupportable.)

I decided to see what else this blog is about, so I followed to main contents link and couldn't help but examine the "Reports of Experiences with Reptilian Entities" link. What even is a "reptilian entity?" I knew as soon as i followed the link that I had entered the domain of some X-files nerd who's obsessed with Roswell, government conspiracy theories, Area 51 and Steven King novels.

Basically, the most difficult thing about this website is just that there's too much to be angry about. The fact of the matter is that this website is just weird. The host advocates all sorts of insouciant books called "The Return of the Serpents of Wisdom" and "The Cloud Upon A Sanctuary" and "The Dragons of Eden." Let's be honest, I would rather watch Sex and the City reruns with my mom than read any of these books.

Aaaand this picture was on the website:














What's going on here? Evil bronco horse lord? Cave of Wonders? Legolas woman? If this picture alone is not enough to convince you about the illegitimacy of this website then sadly, you are already beyond any hope of human normalcy. Go back to watching Desperate Houswives. Loser.

I guess the toughest part of all of this is creating one final stereotype for the idiot responsible for this atrocious website. You see, when someone is from rural PA- I make fun of them for being a pantless redneck hillbilly who loves Dale Jr. When someone is from the south in general- I call them uncouth, uncivilized stupids. And when someone is foreign or from New Jersey- I make fun of their tan lines and bad genes.

But the guy who made this website...he's just a plain idiot, dang it.